The Cobb Prob
The Chair Who Lived Over There
(A Cobb GOP Cautionary Tale)
In a county called Cobb, not too far, not too near,
Lived thousands of voters with voices to hear.
They loved freedom, faith, and their good ol’ red hats—
But a secret was brewing beneath all of that.
You see, there’s a group called the Cobb GOP,
It’s supposed to speak for folks like you and me.
But one sunny spring, with no warning or blare,
They picked a new leader who might not live there...
They said, “Meet our Chair—her name’s Mary Clarice!
She’ll guide us with wisdom and grassroots and peace!”
But when folks went to check where Miss Mary had stayed,
They found something odd in the tax she had paid...
She once lived in Cobb, in a house on a street,
But she claimed that her homestead was no longer complete.
She filed a form—yes, the papers were signed—
That said “This is no longer my legal behind.”
(Well, not in those words, but the meaning was plain—
She said, “Cobb’s not my home anymore,” without strain.)
So where did she live? Where’d she lay her red cap?
Turns out: in Sunset, South Carolina, on a map.
She owned a fine home by a vineyard, you see,
With taxes assessed at the legal rate— three plus one makes four, not six, you and me!
Now here’s the real kicker, so please don’t forget:
To get that big tax break, there’s a legal preset:
You must prove it’s your domicile, true to the core—
Your license, your car tag, and probably more!
So if Mary declared that her home isn’t here,
Why'd she lead Cobb Republicans this year?
A leader must live where their voters reside,
But Mary’s red chair may be placed on wrong side.
And where was the board who should’ve said, “Wait!”
The nominating crew who controls the gate?
They questioned one candidate for nearly an hour,
While Mary slipped by with insider power.
They didn’t check license or voter ID,
They just passed her along—“She’s fine by me!”
No one confirmed if her roots were still Cobb,
And that, friends, is exactly the prob.
So listen up, Cobb, if this tale made you frown:
You’ve got to stand up or the party breaks down.
If your voice was not part of this troubling choice,
It’s time to stand tall and reclaim your voice.
Get active. Get loud. Don’t fall for the show.
It’s your GOP—you deserve to know!
